24 Months

We have reached the two year mark in our adoption journey...

We are happy to have two years behind us, knowing that we are that much closer to our Little One, however, we are sad, anxious and somewhat frustrated, we are now entering a different phase of our adoption journey... the unknown. We now have no idea how long it could take for us to receive our referral and the parameters that we once thought we had have been removed. As far as we know there haven't been any families who have passed 30 months. We are hopeful that we'll get the call soon-ish.

Here's a recap of the past month... I feel like I should warn you though, it's been a rough month...

The month started with the news from our agency that they project that it is likely that couples who are waiting to adopt will have to wait longer than the original 18-24 month wait time. This news sent me (Tammy) into a little bit of a tailspin... I was having trouble dealing with the news, I allowed myself to be sad for a couple of days.

The next setback came around the middle of the month. We've been having a pretty rainy fall... and on October 15 we had a particularly bad rain storm, we noticed that there was water in the house and after investigating we realized that we had a leak somewhere... the area of the house that was most effected by the leak... was mom's kitchen!! We had just finished laying the tile on the counter - all that was left was the backsplash and a couple of finishing touches. The cleaning company came in, and the insurance company came in and we're waiting for a building inspector to come and tell us where the water may be coming from. After the cleaning company came with their blowers to dry out the walls and the floors (we had 6 blowers and a dehumidifier going for 4 days and nights), they prepared a report for the insurance company - their recommendation is that we open the wall and the floor to find out how much water damage there was and to disinfect any wood that may have come into contact with the water. That means that the kitchen that I've been working on for 6 months...may need to be torn out and started over! The insurance will pay for the damage inside the house, but not the cost of repairing the foundation.

The third traumatic event of the month was our discovery that our heating wasn't working... we were able to have that fixed (for now) but we discovered that our bi-energy system is not working and it'll cost a pretty penny to replace the broken heat pump. Needless to say I could have done without all three of these events this month.

Not all was doom and gloom though this month, we went apple picking, which is always a fun fall family highlight. We had a big Thanksgiving dinner, Rachelle was home for Thanksgiving dinner for the first time in two years. We went shopping to buy some gear for our Little One. We helped with the Play it Forward Kids Champs game that pitted the winners of the Kingston tournament against the winners of Montreal. We got some cool media coverage from a local TV station (CTV) and everyone seemed to have a lot of fun.

While doing some blog reading today, I came across a post by one of my favorite "Mommy Bloggers" - The Meanest Mom - the post was entitled "we are where we are for a reason". I was encouraged by the fact that while it's no fun to be stuck where we don't want to be...we are where we are for a reason...and it was just what I needed to hear today...so thanks Meanest Mom for reminding me.

A Baby (Little One) Carrier

Last weekend, we asked our niece if she would help us to try out a baby carrier for our Little One. We have been looking around for one that would allow us to carry around our Little One and since we don't know how big (or little) they will be when we get them, it's important to us that we get a carrier that will allow us to carry a child for as long as possible. Our niece is 4 years old, and although she's quite tall for her age, she doesn't weigh 40lbs yet. So we picked her up on Saturday morning and headed over to a great shop near us; FloUrbain. We knew that she may change her mind at any moment, but we hoped that that wouldn't be the case. We looked all around the boutique and let her touch and play with whatever she wanted to, so that she would feel comfortable. We had to wait a little while to try on the carrier; when it was our turn, Brit said "Auntie Tammy, I think I changed my mind". We decided to try the carrier on using the 15lb doll at the store. Afterwards, I convinced her to come to a corner of the store where we would be by ourselves (without the salesperson) and she agreed to jump into the carrier...it was surprisingly easy to put on and carry her around in it....and she was able to tell me that it was comfortable. Then it was Uncle Rikki's turn to try the carriers both with the doll and with Britney.

We decided on the Ergo Baby carrier. It was an investment, but we plan to use it to promote attachment and to help us when we travel, so we thought the expense was worth it.



We also bought some "Little People" from Plan Toys...I loved playing with Little People when I was little, so when we saw these little people...we couldn't resist!

When we brought Britney home, we showed her mom how the carrier worked...Britney was so comfortable...she didn't want to get out...she snuggled in and rested for about 5 or 10 minutes with her head on my shoulder while I talked to her mom...this from a little munchkin who can't sit still for a minute!

Britney...Thanks so much cutie for helping Auntie Tammy and Uncle Rikki...it means a lot to us that you helped us with this special purchase! We can't wait to see you playing with your new little cousin!

Still waiting...

We received an email from our agency on October 1, 2010 about the possibility of our wait time passing the projected 18-24 months. Although there has been no official word from ICAB, our agency has quite a few families who have passed the 24 month mark, or who are about to do so (like us). They informed us that we should be prepared to wait for another 6 months or so!

It was really hard to hear, and we had a hard time digesting the news, we thought that our wait was almost over... We took the time to grieve, and to digest the news. We're still hopeful that we'll get the call soon...but we're also starting to wrap our minds around the fact that we may not be parents for another year. It is difficult, but we know that there is a reason for everything.

23 months...three weeks...three days...and counting...