Tuesday, April 21, 2009

A little reviewing...

After my last post, I received a couple of questions that got me thinking about the books that I was reading, so I've written a little blurb about each one - just my thoughts...

Attaching in Adoption
One of the main concerns I have about our adoption is about attaching with our little one. My husband read Deborah Gray's Attaching in Adoption before I did, and since he knows me so well, he recommended that I only read certain chapters that are more relevant to our current situation, so that I don't stress myself out needlessly. Attaching in Adoption is an important resource book for every adoptive family, and it will stay in our Adoption Library.

Conquering Infertility
I must admit that when our social worker first recommended a book about conquering your infertility, I was a little confused. We'll be married for ten years this year and after undergoing infertility treatments; being diagnosed with Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome; and taking time to grieve the loss of the biological child we will not have; I can honestly say that at the point in time when the social worker recommeded this book, I felt that I had dealt with my infertility. I got the book anyway and began reading it anyway, and it helped me to see that, I had dealt with the main issues related to my infertility, which was reassuring since we're now on a different path. It also helped me to understand why I had behaved and/or reacted in certain ways in certain instances/situations. Although I wish I had read this book while I was first dealing with infertility, I am glad to have read it and to know for sure that we are in the right place and on the right path now.

Secret thoughts of an adoptive mother
This is one of my favorite books! I admire Jana Wolff's humour, candor, and honesty! Reading her book is a little like reading a friend's diary, in it, she openly shares her thoughts and fears regarding her adoption. Although the paths to our children are different (she chose open domestic adoption), her concerns about being an adoptive parent really resonated with me. While reading this book, I slowly began to feel that the feelings, and thoughts I have/am having are "normal", and for that I am grateful.

Becoming a family
This book had great information about healthy attachments. The chapter "bringing your baby home" has lots of great information that I plan to use to help us educate our family and friends about what to expect when our little one comes home. The author shares important information about the need for your child to be physically attached to you for the first while to help to promote healthy attachment.

The whole life adoption book
I'm only halfway through this book, but what I like is that it is full of practical ideas to help you through different situations with your child. It has some suggestions for educating family, friends, educators, and important people in your child's life. There is a summary at the end of each chapter as well as a list of questions for small groups (it would be nice to have a small group wouldn't it?!).

Labor of the heart
This book is another one - for the journey to adoption, It was one of my favorite books about working through the decisions to adopt and preparing to be a parent. At the end of each chapter, there is a section called "Adoptive Parents' Workbook" that encourages the parents to evaluate themselves based on the topic of the chapter.

So...there you have it...my two cents...what are your favorite adoption related books?

4 comments:

Amber said...

Tammy,

thanks so much for the review of the books! That's really helpful and useful info!

Like you, I feel that we have worked through a lot of the issues related to infertility and grieving the loss of the biological child we'll never have...we had to before getting to the point where we were ready to consider adoption! I would really have appreciated the book on conquering infertility a couple of years ago! Still, you've made me curious to read it. The Secret Thoughts of an Adoptive Mother book sounds interesting too...

I agree with you, it would be nice to have a small group! As you know, this summer we're moving to Gatineau and we'll only be two hours away! Plus, I still have family and friends in Montreal (on the South Shore), and my husband often has meetings in Montreal...
In short, we're in Montreal pretty often, and if you would like, maybe we could meet up sometime this summer?!
Hey, we could exchange books :0)
And maybe our little ones can play together someday :0)
And the dogs too, why not?! Let's not forget them! hihihihihi

Jenny said...

Tammy,
Hi! I just love finding more couples adopting from the Philippines. I am going to have to look into some of those books that you have suggested. I used to read all of the time before kids, but now (besides reading to them) I rarely find time to read for myself...maybe this summer.

Renee and Brian said...

Thanks alot for all the info on the books. It is always good to know what someone else thought of the book before you purchase it. I have a few of the books you talked about and now there are a few more that I need to pick up.

Tam-A-Roo said...

Amber...I live on the South Shore (Greenfield Park)! It would be nice to get together!
Jenny...welcome to our blog
Renee...Happy reading!

Thanks so much for your comments!